Is there a statute of limitations on infidelity?
Before I met my girlfriend, she was in a three-year relationship with her previous boyfriend.
About six months into our relationship, she broke a date with me because her ex-boyfriend contacted her, saying that he was leaving town for good and that he needed to see her one last time. She agreed, despite my opposition, and I went home alone that night as she went off to have coffee with him.
I was rather upset. We talked about it at length, and she apologized for hurting me.
This happened a little over a year and a half ago.
We've since fallen in love and moved in together.
Recently I've found out that she actually wound up sleeping with her ex that night. I feel used and neglected all over again.
I have absolutely no reason to believe she has ever been unfaithful since, and I truly believe she loves me.
But, Amy, if I had found this out that day, or even shortly after, I would have ended the relationship. Now I am burdened with these confusing feelings of sadness and anger, and I am afraid it is going to affect our relationship.
I know I have a right to be angry, but how can I rationalize ending a relationship, or even bringing this up, when it happened so long ago and things have been great since then?
This is a feeling not many would want to have. I had an off again - on again relationship with somebody like that. May that cunt die in a grease fire ignited by her loved ones.
If you have the slightest thought that she has been unfaithful, lying, blowing the Sacramento Kings, etc., then you are probably right. When you spend a significant amount of time with somebody, there is a natural lie detector test that develops in your brain. Inconsistencies in behavior always set this off, and the people that get away with cheating, get away because their partner is too fucking stupid. However, women do have a better chance of getting away with a lie. Men are too ignorant to hold down a lie. Women are better at this because they are inherently evil.
So, really all you are left with is the thought of that night your girl's ex fucked her like a monster truck crushing 6 cars at once. This is enough to cross a man's breaking point to the degree of robbing a bank, beating up their boss, or liking UFC. If there is still a night out of nowhere when she can build up that old passion with an ex, then you know this is not marriage material and will serve you better in the long run.
The thing that concerns me is you are "worried how it will affect your relationship?" THE RELATIONSHIP SHOULD BE OVER THEN AND THERE! One cliche that rings true is 'once a cheater, always a cheater.' You need to either fuck one of your ex's or fuck one of her friends. If she has a sister, fuck her too! You need to let her know that her actions are more of a call to arms than a 'bump in the road' to your shitty relationship. If all else fails, you can pray that she gets raped at a party.