Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Wednesday, Socks

I need help! I am a 30 year old professional male with my own condo in the city. I have a bunch of friends who are girls and are constantly trying to set me up with their friends because of what a great guy I am. But even with all of their opinions leading towards me being so "great" eventually the latest girl will leave me the same as the rest. The last girl left because I kept asking her to wear tube socks while we are making love, which I don't think is good reason to leave! (Jennifer you know who you are!) There are people out there who like to wear full animal costumes while doing it, tube socks are not that bad! I just really like them, I mean they have been around from when I first figured out how to please myself through the movie flash dance and at every sexual junction in my life! It's not like I only like purple ones either, nope, I will take any color, green, black, white, striped, even argyle!!! Is it so wrong to love their elastic goodness so much?
Throughout the whole question I deeply sympathized, and maybe empathized a fact or two until you brought up Flash Dance. But, since I'm a lover and not a Street Fighter, I will pretend I didn't read that. Setting yourself up as the 'good guy' comes with expectations. Like, you are going to be there for your gal pals when Bruno breaks her heart. Or maybe that you aren't afraid to say you like The Notebook. Or maybe you get salty-er than an ocean and say that you wish your voice sounded like that dude from Matchbox 20. In any case, women have already categorized you as a vagina with a dick extension. So, when you pull out the whole sock thing, the surprise hits them harder than Hurricane Katrina. I, too am down with the whole tube sock. And even for good measure, those black lines baseball players put under their eyes. Enough about my sporty fucks... You are totally natural in liking something particular. Women like a huge bank acccount and nobody is double penetration deep in their business! What the S?! Keep doing what you are doing, and I'm sure the ass-to-mouth ho right girl will come along.